{"id":5965,"date":"2025-03-09T22:13:40","date_gmt":"2025-03-10T05:13:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/?p=5965"},"modified":"2026-02-18T23:32:26","modified_gmt":"2026-02-19T07:32:26","slug":"driving-on-the-5","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/","title":{"rendered":"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"\">The I-5 Freeway\u2014where time, space, and traffic laws are mere suggestions. If you&#8217;ve driven this legendary stretch of pavement that stitches together <a href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/san-diego-slang\/\">San Diego<\/a>, Los Angeles, and all the chaos in between, you know there are certain unspoken rules that every driver seems to know\u2026 but absolutely nobody follows.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_82_2 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-custom ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#The_Left_Lane_Is_for_Speeding_Except_When_Its_Not\" >The Left Lane Is for Speeding (Except When It\u2019s Not)<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#You_Must_Go_90_MPH_or_9_MPH%E2%80%94Nothing_in_Between\" >You Must Go 90 MPH or 9 MPH\u2014Nothing in Between<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#Turn_Signals_Are_Optional_But_Mind_Reading_Is_Mandatory\" >Turn Signals Are Optional (But Mind Reading Is Mandatory)<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#If_Youre_in_a_Traffic_Jam_Blame_Camp_Pendleton\" >If You\u2019re in a Traffic Jam, Blame Camp Pendleton<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#The_Merge_at_La_Jolla_Is_Survival_of_the_Fittest\" >The Merge at La Jolla Is Survival of the Fittest<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-6\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#The_805_Split_Will_Always_Betray_You\" >The 805 Split Will Always Betray You<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-7\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#Theres_a_100_Chance_of_a_CHP_Hiding_Somewhere\" >There\u2019s a 100% Chance of a CHP Hiding Somewhere<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-8\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#The_Carpool_Lane_Is_a_Free-for-All\" >The Carpool Lane Is a Free-for-All<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-9\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#Northbound_on_a_Friday_Youre_Stuck_Forever\" >Northbound on a Friday? You\u2019re Stuck Forever<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-10\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#Mission_Bay_to_Downtown_Thats_at_Least_17_Waze_Routes\" >Mission Bay to Downtown? That\u2019s at Least 17 Waze Routes<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-11\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#If_You_See_a_Mattress_on_the_Road_No_You_Didnt\" >If You See a Mattress on the Road, No You Didn\u2019t<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-12\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#If_You_Go_South_Too_Far%E2%80%A6_Adios_Amigos\" >If You Go South Too Far&#8230; Adios Amigos!<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-13\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#Your_Exit_Will_Sneak_Up_on_You_at_the_Worst_Possible_Time\" >Your Exit Will Sneak Up on You at the Worst Possible Time<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-14\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#If_You_Dont_See_a_Car_Fire_Wait_Five_Minutes\" >If You Don\u2019t See a Car Fire, Wait Five Minutes<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-15\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#The_Real_Unwritten_Rule_Nobody_Actually_Knows_How_to_Drive_Here\" >The Real Unwritten Rule: Nobody Actually Knows How to Drive Here<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-16\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#The_On-Ramp_Meter_Lights_Are_Just_Drag_Race_Starters\" >The On-Ramp Meter Lights Are Just Drag Race Starters<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_Left_Lane_Is_for_Speeding_Except_When_Its_Not\"><\/span>The Left Lane Is for Speeding (Except When It\u2019s Not)<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">It\u2019s the fast lane, but that doesn\u2019t stop someone in a Prius from setting the cruise control to 57 mph while a parade of angry commuters builds behind them. Passing on the right is the only viable option at this point.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"You_Must_Go_90_MPH_or_9_MPH%E2%80%94Nothing_in_Between\"><\/span>You Must Go 90 MPH or 9 MPH\u2014Nothing in Between<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">There\u2019s no middle ground. It\u2019s either Formula 1 speeds or a crawling parking lot. The transition happens without warning and usually right after you take a sip of coffee.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Turn_Signals_Are_Optional_But_Mind_Reading_Is_Mandatory\"><\/span>Turn Signals Are Optional (But Mind Reading Is Mandatory)<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">Why use a blinker when you can just suddenly swerve into another lane and hope for the best? Bonus points if you wait until the last possible second to cut across four lanes for your exit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"instagram-media\" data-instgrm-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/DGR0jKXJ9cD\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" data-instgrm-version=\"14\" style=\" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:540px; min-width:0; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);\"><div style=\"padding:16px;\"> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/DGR0jKXJ9cD\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;\" target=\"_blank\"> <div style=\" display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;\"> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 19% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;\"><svg width=\"50px\" height=\"50px\" viewBox=\"0 0 60 60\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" xmlns:xlink=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/1999\/xlink\"><g stroke=\"none\" stroke-width=\"1\" fill=\"none\" fill-rule=\"evenodd\"><g transform=\"translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)\" fill=\"#000000\"><g><path d=\"M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631\"><\/path><\/g><\/g><\/g><\/svg><\/div><div style=\"padding-top: 8px;\"> <div style=\" color:#3897f0; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:550; line-height:18px;\">View this post on Instagram<\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 12.5% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;\"><div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: 8px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: auto;\"> <div style=\" width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);\"><\/div><\/div><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/a><p style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/DGR0jKXJ9cD\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none;\" target=\"_blank\">A post shared by San Diego Humor (@sandiegohumor)<\/a><\/p><\/div><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"If_Youre_in_a_Traffic_Jam_Blame_Camp_Pendleton\"><\/span>If You\u2019re in a <a href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/san-diego-life-hacks\/\">Traffic<\/a> Jam, Blame Camp Pendleton<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">It doesn\u2019t matter where you are on the 5, someone will always say, \u201cIt\u2019s probably Camp Pendleton traffic.\u201d Are they right? Maybe. Does anyone actually know? Not really.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_Merge_at_La_Jolla_Is_Survival_of_the_Fittest\"><\/span>The Merge at La Jolla Is Survival of the Fittest<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">Merging onto the 5 South from La Jolla during rush hour is like trying to zipper merge with wild animals\u2014nobody wants to let you in, and yet everyone is trying to merge at the same time. It&#8217;s comes out of nowhere but you can drift your way in the ramp like Fast and Furious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"instagram-media\" data-instgrm-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/C8vhAGdJPNo\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" data-instgrm-version=\"14\" style=\" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:540px; min-width:0; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);\"><div style=\"padding:16px;\"> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/C8vhAGdJPNo\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;\" target=\"_blank\"> <div style=\" display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;\"> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 19% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;\"><svg width=\"50px\" height=\"50px\" viewBox=\"0 0 60 60\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" xmlns:xlink=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/1999\/xlink\"><g stroke=\"none\" stroke-width=\"1\" fill=\"none\" fill-rule=\"evenodd\"><g transform=\"translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)\" fill=\"#000000\"><g><path d=\"M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631\"><\/path><\/g><\/g><\/g><\/svg><\/div><div style=\"padding-top: 8px;\"> <div style=\" color:#3897f0; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:550; line-height:18px;\">View this post on Instagram<\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 12.5% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;\"><div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: 8px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: auto;\"> <div style=\" width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);\"><\/div><\/div><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/a><p style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/C8vhAGdJPNo\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none;\" target=\"_blank\">A post shared by San Diego Humor (@sandiegohumor)<\/a><\/p><\/div><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_805_Split_Will_Always_Betray_You\"><\/span>The 805 Split Will Always Betray You<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">Every San Diegan has been burned by the 805\/5 split at least once. Try merging 8 lanes to get on the highway you need without an accident&#8230; it&#8217;s a skill. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"instagram-media\" data-instgrm-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/C1s8e9dLzmZ\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" data-instgrm-version=\"14\" style=\" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:540px; min-width:0; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);\"><div style=\"padding:16px;\"> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/C1s8e9dLzmZ\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;\" target=\"_blank\"> <div style=\" display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;\"> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 19% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;\"><svg width=\"50px\" height=\"50px\" viewBox=\"0 0 60 60\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" xmlns:xlink=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/1999\/xlink\"><g stroke=\"none\" stroke-width=\"1\" fill=\"none\" fill-rule=\"evenodd\"><g transform=\"translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)\" fill=\"#000000\"><g><path d=\"M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631\"><\/path><\/g><\/g><\/g><\/svg><\/div><div style=\"padding-top: 8px;\"> <div style=\" color:#3897f0; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:550; line-height:18px;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/san-diego-scenic-roads\/\">View<\/a> this post on Instagram<\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 12.5% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;\"><div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: 8px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: auto;\"> <div style=\" width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);\"><\/div><\/div><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/a><p style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/C1s8e9dLzmZ\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none;\" target=\"_blank\">A post shared by San Diego Humor (@sandiegohumor)<\/a><\/p><\/div><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Theres_a_100_Chance_of_a_CHP_Hiding_Somewhere\"><\/span>There\u2019s a 100% Chance of a CHP Hiding Somewhere<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">California Highway Patrol is always lurking\u2014usually right after a blind curve, just waiting for someone to go 1 mph over the limit so they can have a nice little chat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_Carpool_Lane_Is_a_Free-for-All\"><\/span>The Carpool Lane Is a Free-for-All<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">It\u2019s supposed to be for carpoolers, but tell that to the lone wolf in a Tesla who just blew past you at 95 mph because apparently being rich counts as two people.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Northbound_on_a_Friday_Youre_Stuck_Forever\"><\/span>Northbound on a Friday? You\u2019re Stuck Forever<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">Anyone driving north on the 5 on a Friday afternoon should pack a survival kit. You\u2019ll be trapped behind a sea of LA-bound cars, all filled with people who apparently just discovered how to brake for the first time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Mission_Bay_to_Downtown_Thats_at_Least_17_Waze_Routes\"><\/span>Mission Bay to Downtown? That\u2019s at Least 17 Waze Routes<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">You could take the 5, the 8, the 163, surface streets, or just wing it\u2014either way, Waze will reroute you 12 times and still say you\u2019re late.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"If_You_See_a_Mattress_on_the_Road_No_You_Didnt\"><\/span>If You See a Mattress on the <a href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/bizarre-only-in-san-diego-moments\/\">Road<\/a>, No You Didn\u2019t<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">It\u2019s an unwritten rule that the 5 always has at least one stray mattress on it at all times. If you see it, swerve accordingly and don\u2019t ask questions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"If_You_Go_South_Too_Far%E2%80%A6_Adios_Amigos\"><\/span>If You Go South Too Far&#8230; Adios Amigos!<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">Miss your exit in San Ysidro, and congratulations\u2014you\u2019re now on a one-way trip to Tijuana with no turning back. Hope you brought your passport, because U-turns aren\u2019t really a thing at the border.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"instagram-media\" data-instgrm-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/reel\/C7zN99sJOc2\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" data-instgrm-version=\"14\" style=\" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:540px; min-width:0; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);\"><div style=\"padding:16px;\"> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/reel\/C7zN99sJOc2\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;\" target=\"_blank\"> <div style=\" display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;\"> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 19% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;\"><svg width=\"50px\" height=\"50px\" viewBox=\"0 0 60 60\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" xmlns:xlink=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/1999\/xlink\"><g stroke=\"none\" stroke-width=\"1\" fill=\"none\" fill-rule=\"evenodd\"><g transform=\"translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)\" fill=\"#000000\"><g><path d=\"M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631\"><\/path><\/g><\/g><\/g><\/svg><\/div><div style=\"padding-top: 8px;\"> <div style=\" color:#3897f0; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:550; line-height:18px;\">View this post on Instagram<\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 12.5% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;\"><div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: 8px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: auto;\"> <div style=\" width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);\"><\/div><\/div><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/a><p style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/reel\/C7zN99sJOc2\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none;\" target=\"_blank\">A post shared by San Diego Humor (@sandiegohumor)<\/a><\/p><\/div><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Your_Exit_Will_Sneak_Up_on_You_at_the_Worst_Possible_Time\"><\/span>Your Exit Will Sneak Up on You at the Worst Possible Time<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">You had 15 miles to prepare, but somehow, your exit is suddenly right there, and now you have 0.5 seconds to cross four <a href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/best-way-to-get-from-san-diego-to-lax\/\">la<\/a>nes of traffic before you miss it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"If_You_Dont_See_a_Car_Fire_Wait_Five_Minutes\"><\/span>If You Don\u2019t See a Car Fire, Wait Five Minutes<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">There\u2019s always some car engulfed in flames on the side of the 5, and nobody is surprised. We\u2019re just grateful it\u2019s not ours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_Real_Unwritten_Rule_Nobody_Actually_Knows_How_to_Drive_Here\"><\/span>The Real Unwritten Rule: Nobody Actually Knows How to Drive Here<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">At the end of the day, the only true rule of driving on the 5 is that nobody knows what they\u2019re doing, but we all pretend we do. And most of the time it&#8217;s just Zonies visiting San Diego that get in our way. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_On-Ramp_Meter_Lights_Are_Just_Drag_Race_Starters\"><\/span>The On-Ramp Meter Lights Are Just Drag Race Starters<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\">You <em>could<\/em> wait patiently for your turn when the ramp meter light turns green\u2026 but let\u2019s be real. The second that light flickers, it\u2019s Fast &amp; Furious: I-5 Drift as you floor it and pray your 2009 Corolla has one last burst of life left in it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"\"><em>(Bonus points if you ignore the &#8220;2 cars per green&#8221; rule entirely and just go when the car in front of you moves.)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"instagram-media\" data-instgrm-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/DGjwaxkvpqy\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" data-instgrm-version=\"14\" style=\" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:540px; min-width:0; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);\"><div style=\"padding:16px;\"> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/DGjwaxkvpqy\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;\" target=\"_blank\"> <div style=\" display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;\"> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 19% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;\"><svg width=\"50px\" height=\"50px\" viewBox=\"0 0 60 60\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" xmlns:xlink=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/1999\/xlink\"><g stroke=\"none\" stroke-width=\"1\" fill=\"none\" fill-rule=\"evenodd\"><g transform=\"translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)\" fill=\"#000000\"><g><path d=\"M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631\"><\/path><\/g><\/g><\/g><\/svg><\/div><div style=\"padding-top: 8px;\"> <div style=\" color:#3897f0; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:550; line-height:18px;\">View this post on Instagram<\/div><\/div><div style=\"padding: 12.5% 0;\"><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;\"><div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;\"><\/div> <div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: 8px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)\"><\/div><\/div><div style=\"margin-left: auto;\"> <div style=\" width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);\"><\/div> <div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);\"><\/div><\/div><\/div> <div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;\"> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;\"><\/div> <div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;\"><\/div><\/div><\/a><p style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/DGjwaxkvpqy\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none;\" target=\"_blank\">A post shared by San Diego Humor (@sandiegohumor)<\/a><\/p><\/div><\/blockquote>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The I-5 Freeway\u2014where time, space, and traffic laws are mere suggestions. If you&#8217;ve driven this legendary stretch of pavement that stitches together San Diego, Los Angeles, and all the chaos &#8230; <a title=\"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway)\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about 16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway)\"> <\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5977,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_yoast_wpseo_focuskw":"","_yoast_wpseo_title":"","_yoast_wpseo_metadesc":"The 16 unwritten rules of driving on the I-5 that every San Diego local breaks anyway. A humorous guide to freeway survival.","_yoast_wpseo_linkdex":"","_yoast_wpseo_content_score":"90","nf_dc_page":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[45,46],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5965","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-local-insights","category-san-diego","infinite-scroll-item","generate-columns","tablet-grid-50","mobile-grid-100","grid-parent","grid-33","no-featured-image-padding"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway) - SanDiegoHumor<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The 16 unwritten rules of driving on the I-5 that every San Diego local breaks anyway. A humorous guide to freeway survival.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway) - SanDiegoHumor\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The 16 unwritten rules of driving on the I-5 that every San Diego local breaks anyway. A humorous guide to freeway survival.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"SanDiegoHumor\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/facebook.com\/officialsandiegohumor\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2025-03-10T05:13:40+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-02-19T07:32:26+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/cars-on-the-5.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1024\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"574\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"SanDiegoHumor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@SanDiegoHumor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@SanDiegoHumor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"SanDiegoHumor\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"SanDiegoHumor\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/15419f1a5fc7b80c004de32b138e404c\"},\"headline\":\"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway)\",\"datePublished\":\"2025-03-10T05:13:40+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-02-19T07:32:26+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":858,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2025\\\/03\\\/cars-on-the-5.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Locals Only\",\"San Diego\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/\",\"name\":\"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway) - SanDiegoHumor\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2025\\\/03\\\/cars-on-the-5.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2025-03-10T05:13:40+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-02-19T07:32:26+00:00\",\"description\":\"The 16 unwritten rules of driving on the I-5 that every San Diego local breaks anyway. A humorous guide to freeway survival.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2025\\\/03\\\/cars-on-the-5.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2025\\\/03\\\/cars-on-the-5.jpg\",\"width\":1024,\"height\":574,\"caption\":\"cars driving on the I-5 highway\"},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/driving-on-the-5\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Locals Only\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/local-insights\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":3,\"name\":\"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway)\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/\",\"name\":\"SanDiegoHumor\",\"description\":\"San Diego Blog, Clothes, and Accessories\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Humor Media LLC dba SanDiegoHumor\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/logo\\\/image\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2023\\\/10\\\/cropped-SanDiegoHumor-Website-Logo.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2023\\\/10\\\/cropped-SanDiegoHumor-Website-Logo.png\",\"width\":600,\"height\":454,\"caption\":\"Humor Media LLC dba SanDiegoHumor\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/logo\\\/image\\\/\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/facebook.com\\\/officialsandiegohumor\",\"https:\\\/\\\/x.com\\\/SanDiegoHumor\",\"https:\\\/\\\/www.instagram.com\\\/sandiegohumor\\\/\",\"https:\\\/\\\/www.tiktok.com\\\/@sandiegohumor\"]},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/15419f1a5fc7b80c004de32b138e404c\",\"name\":\"SanDiegoHumor\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/67acc36c069e22f87dcd28b889d322d37be81cf9114e04168f73ba22afdba229?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/67acc36c069e22f87dcd28b889d322d37be81cf9114e04168f73ba22afdba229?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/67acc36c069e22f87dcd28b889d322d37be81cf9114e04168f73ba22afdba229?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"SanDiegoHumor\"},\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/sandiegohumor.com\\\/author\\\/dmagarian1\\\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway) - SanDiegoHumor","description":"The 16 unwritten rules of driving on the I-5 that every San Diego local breaks anyway. A humorous guide to freeway survival.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway) - SanDiegoHumor","og_description":"The 16 unwritten rules of driving on the I-5 that every San Diego local breaks anyway. A humorous guide to freeway survival.","og_url":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/","og_site_name":"SanDiegoHumor","article_publisher":"https:\/\/facebook.com\/officialsandiegohumor","article_published_time":"2025-03-10T05:13:40+00:00","article_modified_time":"2026-02-19T07:32:26+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1024,"height":574,"url":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/cars-on-the-5.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"SanDiegoHumor","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@SanDiegoHumor","twitter_site":"@SanDiegoHumor","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"SanDiegoHumor","Est. reading time":"1 minute"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/"},"author":{"name":"SanDiegoHumor","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#\/schema\/person\/15419f1a5fc7b80c004de32b138e404c"},"headline":"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway)","datePublished":"2025-03-10T05:13:40+00:00","dateModified":"2026-02-19T07:32:26+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/"},"wordCount":858,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#organization"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/cars-on-the-5.jpg","articleSection":["Locals Only","San Diego"],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/","url":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/","name":"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway) - SanDiegoHumor","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/cars-on-the-5.jpg","datePublished":"2025-03-10T05:13:40+00:00","dateModified":"2026-02-19T07:32:26+00:00","description":"The 16 unwritten rules of driving on the I-5 that every San Diego local breaks anyway. A humorous guide to freeway survival.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/cars-on-the-5.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/cars-on-the-5.jpg","width":1024,"height":574,"caption":"cars driving on the I-5 highway"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/driving-on-the-5\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Locals Only","item":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/local-insights\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"name":"16 Unwritten Rules of Driving on the 5 (That Everyone Breaks Anyway)"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/","name":"SanDiegoHumor","description":"San Diego Blog, Clothes, and Accessories","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#organization","name":"Humor Media LLC dba SanDiegoHumor","url":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/10\/cropped-SanDiegoHumor-Website-Logo.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/10\/cropped-SanDiegoHumor-Website-Logo.png","width":600,"height":454,"caption":"Humor Media LLC dba SanDiegoHumor"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/facebook.com\/officialsandiegohumor","https:\/\/x.com\/SanDiegoHumor","https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/sandiegohumor\/","https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@sandiegohumor"]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/#\/schema\/person\/15419f1a5fc7b80c004de32b138e404c","name":"SanDiegoHumor","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/67acc36c069e22f87dcd28b889d322d37be81cf9114e04168f73ba22afdba229?s=96&d=mm&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/67acc36c069e22f87dcd28b889d322d37be81cf9114e04168f73ba22afdba229?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/67acc36c069e22f87dcd28b889d322d37be81cf9114e04168f73ba22afdba229?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"SanDiegoHumor"},"url":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/author\/dmagarian1\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5965","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5965"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5965\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7311,"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5965\/revisions\/7311"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5977"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5965"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5965"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandiegohumor.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5965"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}