SAN DIEGO — As the government shutdown stretches on, San Diego International Airport has adopted a savory solution to its TSA staffing crisis: enlisting employees from local In-N-Out Burger joints. Known for their expertise in transforming chaos into efficiently moving lines, the In-N-Out staff are now serving up security checks with a side of smiles.
With travelers reporting TSA wait times in Terminal 2 skyrocketing to over four hours, the presence of In-N-Out workers has been heralded as a refreshing change. “The moment I heard ‘Hi, welcome to In-N-Out!’ as I approached the security line, I knew this was going to be different,” said traveler Linda Martinez, digging through her bag for the third time after confusing it with her carry-on.
Equipped with their signature crossed-arms-behind-back stance, the burger maestros have been streamlining processes by implementing their own version of a ‘secret menu’ for TSA pre-check: a system no one understands but instinctively respects. “We just ask passengers if they want their bin Animal Style or Neapolitan,” explained shift manager Tyler Nguyen, “and somehow they start organizing themselves.”
TSA officials are reportedly considering making the partnership permanent. “These guys know how to handle spring break crowds that treat ordering like defusing a bomb,” noted TSA spokesperson Angela Ruiz. “Plus, their smiles seem to make people forget we’re confiscating their water bottles.”
As travelers pile into Terminal 1, some whisper rumors of cult-like chants echoing from the Burger King at Gate 32—possibly because they’ve been waiting so long, they now believe a Double-Double will appear at the end of the line.
